pain.

I have a hard time explaining to people that I will not get better. This is only going to get progressively worse, if anything, and I am in pain everyday. Most of the students I go to school with only worry about making it to Friday, so they can party on the weekend. They complain about having to study, while here I am not sure if I am going to make it through class because the pain is too bad. I write this from my couch, heat pad on high on my back, neck brace on with my Real Time Pain Relief MAXX ointment lathered on my neck and back praying that this pain will pass quickly. I am on methocarbamol, a muscle relaxer, and am trying my best to only take one tramadol a day. I have lidocaine patches that I wear 12 hours on (although they don’t ever stay on that long!), 12 hours off on my lower back. I take tylenol and advil daily in addition to these other medications to try to alleviate anything. The pain is the worse thing having to deal with, but I also have weekly allergic reactions. Last Wednesday I had a horrible reaction that left me wheezing, covered in red splotches, and horrible gastrointestinal discomfort. I try my best to push forward and to see the best, which I have so much to be thankful for, but sometimes it’s hard to stay focused. I also suffer with depression and anxiety. The brain’s way of processing pain is similar to depression, so it definitely can have an impact on my mental health. I have had to take a year off in total from college to deal with this and it’s something I’ll have to fight everyday for the rest of my life. I am so incredibly blessed to have a partner willing to stick it out with me and be not only my best friend and husband, but my caretaker too for days that I can’t get by or nights that I come home with tears.

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I want to create a safe place for people suffering, not only with chronic illnesses, but with mental health as well. We are in this together. Please feel free to comment if you need help or want to discuss your challenges.

Xo,

Cass

February.

In honor of my birth month and Valentine’s Day, I decided to participate in some self love and treat myself. First and foremost, Eleven will be coming home at the end of the month and I am so excited to have her in our lives! Mavis will have so much fun being a big sister and having a playmate. We got to visit our little pipsqueak last weekend and instantly fell head over! She is one of nine puppies and the runt of the litter. We’ve already gotten her crate, food, puppy pads, a collar, and some toys! She’ll be using some of Mavis’s hand-me-downs, but I don’t think she’ll mind!

In addition to my puglet, I finally caved in and got my septum pierced today! It wasn’t bad at all, but then again I had nine piercings before adding this one to the mix, so I might not be the best judgement of pain. The jewelry that the piercer used is huge, so I am looking forward to downsizing in the form of this gorgeous jewelry from Etsy! I had been wanting this one for a long time, but always “chickened out” because of what others would think. I really like it and I think that it adds a bit of feminine edge, when done right, to your look!

I wanted to get a few pieces to add to my wardrobe in addition to my septum scheptum. I got a pair of joggers in black because being comfy is key to life. If I can look decent while wearing pajama-like clothes, I’ll have a good day ahead. Urban Outfitters happened to have quite a few different lounge pants on sale, so I snagged some in my favorite color that says maybe I can still be fashionable while managing to balance my inner slob.

I also loved this roll bag that features vegan leather. I had taken a long purse hiatus, but girls need their stuff you know? I might just have to do a “what’s in my bag” post to celebrate my responsible purse-wearing self. We’ll have to see!

I got these cute no-show socks because wearing vans slip-ons with regular socks looks hilariously like a rendition on the old man with high socks and Birkenstocks look, which is not my thing.

 

Ultimately a great little haul. I’ve decide to splurge one more time, but this is more of a joint gift from my love and myself in the form of microbladed eyebrows!! I have been teased about my eyebrows since I was child. I have naturally very thin eyebrows which had lead people to think I over tweeze (never have I!). My brother used to call me browless growing up and I have been secretly obsessing over Little Linda‘s amazing brow work. I have a half sleeve (which I’m going to continue on, slowly-but-surely) and a few here-and-there tattoos, so I’m not really to scared about the process. I trust Linda and I am so excited to get my dream brows (especially in time for my wedding!)!

Remember to treat yourself every now and then! You deserve it after all!

xo

Cass & Mav

Pugs, Pugs, Pugs

Yesterday Mavis celebrated her first birthday! I can’t believe my baby is growing up so fast. She has been a true blessing in my life and a huge help to my mental health. Mavis is my emotional support animal, so her and I have a special connection and she is allowed to travel with me to help manage my anxiety and depression. To help celebrate her special day, Caleb and I gifted her a giant “Lambchop” stuffed lamb because when I first got her, I gifted her a mini one and it became her favorite toy to play with. We were so busy yesterday with cake tasting and meeting with our photographer that we didn’t even get to do much, plus I had a bad pain day which left me bed ridden for the rest of the evening, but today we are planning on bringing her to PetsMart and Hobby Lobby. That way she can get a pup-pie and a special treat, plus we have some wedding DIYs supplies to buy! She is my little best friend and I am so happy she’s in my life.

In addition to celebrating Mavis’s birthday in the form of her favorite plush, we also got her a little sister! Meet Eleven, our newest family member! She is two weeks and next weekend we get to visit her. We decided on the name Eleven Mauvé for our gorgeous black baby; Eleven is from one of our favorite series, Stranger Things, and the name Mauvé (pronounced Mauve-aye) was a name I made up when I was around the age of ten and always said that would be the name of my future pug!

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We are so excited to start this new chapter in our life and for Mavis to have a playmate. She’s been down in the dumps, as have I, since losing our beloved kitty, Oliver. Mavis used to play with him all the time [there’s a cute clip in the video I made showing this], so she’s been lonely. We wanted her to have a playmate that she could really get along with and pugs can’t really hurt each other because of their short muzzles. Pugs are my absolute favorite and I am so excited to get our baby home in a month or so. Proud pug addict and momma!

XO,

Cass & Mav

October 7th

These are the beautiful trees we will marry under (Mint Photography)

We have been so busy with wedding planning since the new year and are so incredibly excited and overjoyed to tie the knot in front of our friends and family. Our official date is on a wonderful fall Saturday; October 7th holds special meaning for us, so the date couldn’t be more perfect! After some decision crunching we decided to pick a beautiful Spanish-styled mansion in Belton, Texas as our venue. It’s thirty minutes from our home and a great central location for my side of the family. Caleb and I toured the property two weeks back and immediately knew we wanted it for one of our most important days of our lives. La Rio Mansion is so gorgeous and had all the amenities we were looking for! Absolutely breathtaking scenery is included with some ingenius sleeping plans for the wedding weekend!

(Rachel Whyte Photography)

Getting the date and venue secured are major relieves as those are two of the biggest choices picked by brides and grooms, but we did not stop there and kept moving on forward our path to Robinson. In addition to our gorgeous venue, we have a photographer, florist, and wedding cake baker! We are narrowing in so many details that it’s getting more and more real. Our theme is a bohemian / greenery theme that will included dreamcatchers by the most amazing Genga from Spokewoven! I’m so overly excited, I can’t even begin to explain what this date will mean to both of us.

Below I’ve included some of my favorite pins of our wedding ideas we have in mind! To view more of my pins, check out my wedding board!

(weddingsonline)
ElegantWeddingInvites
Tulle & Chantilly
guide.weddingchicks.com

That’s all for now! So excited (sarcasm) to start my last semester on Monday.

XO,

Cass & Mav

Oliver.

If you have never lost a pet, it is indescribable sorrow. Mixed emotions of being grateful for all the wonderful memories that you shared together, but deep loss that you no longer will share your days together. Oliver was my cat of eleven years. I adopted him in Carteret county in North Carolina where I was told he was born under a house during a hurricane. I originally wanted a female cat badly and Oliver was “marked” as female under the name April. After looking at all the cats and kittens in the shelter, only this beautiful grey tabby kitten was interested in me. I decided that “April” was destined to be mine. The shelter worker examined the little three-month-old kitten and responded that I would not want this one. I was confused. This kitten was so perfect and precious. The lady told me that she was actually a he. I was a little dismayed, but I was in love! There was no changing my mind. My dad and I payed the adoption dues and Oliver became my 13th birthday present although I got him on November 16, 2005, three months before my birthday. Oliver was flea covered, so we worked hard on getting him healthy. By my side through several moves, Oliver was the only cat alongside four dogs and even more special, he belonged to me. I went through major life changes with him there and he was often the fur I cried on through numerous heartbreaks. He was generally a healthy boy despite having horrible allergies and he had severe PTSD around veterinarians, after my mom made him get declawed as a kitten. In his later years he became the sweetest boy; nudging anybody’s head that was close. In 2014 he began having seizures, so I made sure he got a whole work up to find the source of the problem. The vet couldn’t exactly say why Oliver began having these kind asides other than sometimes older cats develop seizures in rare cases. Despite getting yearly vaccinations and examinations, a feline leukemia test came back with a slight positive. I worked in the vet industry for three years and my animals’ health was extremely important to me, so I was shocked and saddened, as well as clueless as to how he could have gotten this disease. Oliver did not spend anytime near other cats and h was strictly an indoor cat. My only speculation is that maybe he picked it up from a house I moved into or maybe the could’ve gotten it from his mother. After a year of Valium therapy, Oliver’s seizures luckily stopped. He was an amazing cat. He loved hiding in boxes and when he was younger he loved licking ‘Gogurt’ frozen yogurt. He often would carry around socks or gloves meowing letting us know he had killed his next victim. He was my best friend and he will be heavily missed. This past Wednesday he went to heaven after having breathing difficulties and no appetite. Upon taking him to the vet, they found he had fluid in his chest and around his heart. I was there with him as he left this world and I hope I get to see him again when I do.

In loving memory of Oliver April “Mr. Kitty” (September 2005 – January 2017)

California.

It’s been quite awhile since I last wrote due to the craziness of my life, ever changing. I finished my last fall semester successfully passing all my classes (yes, even organic chemistry!) and even making good grades! It’s amazing the stress that overcomes me during the semester, but I do my best to stay focused and positive. I find leaning on my fiancé when I’m overwhelmed and praying for guidance, helps me persevere. I was rewarded for my hard work with a new house in Fort Hood that is finally coming together. Caleb and I had been borrowing a futon to sleep on for two months thanks to our neighbors. Our king mattress just arrived (which we get to enjoy upon coming back home) and we acquired an entertainment center, bookshelf, couch, coffee table, and Caleb even got me a XBox 1S for Christmas! I’m excited to finish decorating our home! I plan on doing a home post once we eat everything settled. My parent just gifted us the most beautiful comforter and pillow shams for our new bed that we picked out, perfect to fit our boho vibe. Caleb’s parents are going to be shipping his furniture, art, and items to our house, too, so we will finally have a more furnished place!

Right now we are in sunny California visiting Caleb’s mom and dad in Northridge! Two weeks on the east coast surrounded by love. Caleb’s parents are so incredible! We were able to go to Universal Studios thanks to my wonderful in-laws (to be). Universal just recently opened The Wizarding World of Harry Potter which was incredible! They had two rides including a 3D like one that makes it feel as if you’re flying and a broomstick roller coaster. We enjoyed a delicious frosty butterbeer and even picked a wand out from Ollivander’s (Professor Dumbledore’s of course!). They had Honeydukes candy shop and a wardrobe shop to fit all your Hogwart’s needs. It was so worth it, even the mass crowds pushing me around which causes a good deal of anxiety for me. After spending a good deal of our day at Hogsmeade Village, we headed on a a studio tour which basically is a trolley that takes you behind the scenes of their massive sets. They film The Voice and many other shows currently and we got to see the sets for movies like Back to the Future, Bates Motel, and more. They had a few 3D rides including a King Kong themed one and a Fast and the Furious one. The tour took about 40 minutes, but there was so much to see! We saw Whoville, where the Whovians did a dancing skit with Mr. Grinch, himself. The tour took us through a flooding and rained out old Mexico set and a Jurassic Park. We got to see Bruce at Amityville work his magic on an unsuspecting diver. It was definitely an experience to remember!

The minions had their own attraction where we were “turned” into minions to work for Gru. It ended up being a cute little 3D ride and at the end, Caleb got me the best unicorn that belongs to Agnes in the film! It’s so fluffy! We enjoyed Shrek and Donkey’s 3D ride, and the Mummy’s roller coaster. The Jurassic Park ride was avoided because it was a water ride and we were not about to get soaked! The Walking Dead had a terrifying walk thru attraction which was definitely scare-worthy! Caleb’s mom got us front of the line passes, so we didn’t have to wait in the lines which made the park so much more enjoyable!

I really had a great time at Universal Studios and believe it or not we are headed to Big Bear Mountain! I haven’t seen snow in so long that I am so excited! This will be Mavis’s first time seeing snow, so we’ll have to see if she likes it or not! We will have the cabin for the night complete with a hot tub, so I think that it will be an amazing experience! We haven’t even been here a week yet but have seen such pretty sites!

Yesterday Caleb drove us down to Malibu right on the coast! It was beautiful and we ate Thai food while watching the scenery before driving in the canons back to our home. We’ve spent a day at the Topanga mall looking around and shopping at my favorite stores! I haven’t been on a vacation for so long that this is really so incredible! I couldn’t ask for better company and I’m so grateful I got to bring Mavis with me! She did so great on the airplane, no problems whatsoever! From Dallas, TX to Los Angeles, CA! Stay tuned to here my part two episodes of California dreaming!

One more thing before signing off, Caleb’s dad is a chiropractor and is determined that he can fix my pain in my back! He says that my spine is so out of alignment and in combination with a bulging disc, this is the cause of my issues. He has done a couple of alignments on me now and it does seem to help. He ordered a couple of x-rays, so I’m optimistic on how things will go, since I’ve suffered awhile with chronic everyday pain.


Stay wonderful!

Xo,

Cass & Mav

Busybee

Sorry for the lack of posts, I’ve been so busy with school and the hustle bustle of traveling back and forth from my new home to my school. I moved in with my fiancé about a month ago and it’s been great! We’re getting our little duplex home settled and our neighbors are good friends too! Once the house gets settled I want to post my little interior decorating results. Living in Fort Hood is awesome because I feel safe and I take Mavis for walks often. It can be hard sometimes when Caleb is in the field, but I’m starting to get settled in, but it’ll take awhile to get used to. In other big news, we are planning on getting a baby pug next year! We’re on a waiting list for a black baby girl and we’ve picked a name for her already. The first week of December we’re getting involved with the Austin pug rescue! Mavis will be attending the holiday ceremony and I’m sure she will be the star of the show. That’s all for now!

Xo,

Cass & Mav